The Suit Boutique

   Dream Journal

I WAS A SOLDIER FIGHTING IN A WAR with the aliens who had landed on earth. I was armed with an air rifle that fired thin wire rods instead of bullets. I found myself trapped in a room with one of the aliens. I shot it dead.

Then I was in town. I was walking along the street when I saw a man carrying a huge cheque for £300 million. He had won the lottery. I shouted “Congratulations!” to him and he replied, “Take your ticket to the bank and they will tell you how much you’ve won.” I went to a bank and handed my lottery ticket to the cashier. She told me I had only won £23 so I left and went to another bank. The second bank told me I had won £92—still not enough, so I went to a third bank. This time I was told I had won £62,000 but then the cashier change her mind and told me it was £83,000. I was happy with the amount so I cashed my ticket in and left with a pile of money.

I was a spy, travelling on a bus with a bunch of other spies. We were transporting a Russian agent to turn him over to the authorities. He was an old man with a beard wearing a white suit. I was wearing a bright blue suit with shorts and long socks. I realised that the Russian agent would probably be sent to prison for the rest of his remaining life and I felt sorry for him. The bus stopped and I got off.

I walked through a shopping arcade and came to a small boutique shop that sold men’s suits. There was only enough room in the shop for one customer at a time so I let an elderly man go in before me while I stood outside looking in the window. The clothes were very expensive. There was an overcoat for £235 which I liked. An elderly woman stood next to me and commented on a brown leather suit. She wasn’t sure she liked it. I told her it was practical and reminded me of something Indiana Jones would wear. “You could wear that in the jungle and still be presentable enough to go out to dinner”, I said. Then I told her to avoid white cotton suits because they crease. I turned to walk away and saw a young Audrey Hepburn. It was the 1940s.